"If a commission by an earthly king is considered an honor, how can a commission by a Heavenly King be considered a sacrifice?"
-David Livingstone

July 27, 2011


I'm not really quite sure what to say... In short, Jabez is re-hospitalized.
It's been a long day. Yesterday, to my great dismay, Jabez starting coughing again. This morning he vomited and, as he was coughing, I listened to his lungs noting some slight wheezing with a respiratory rate of 36. By later morning it had progressed to very unclear lung sounds with audible wheezing and a respiratory rate of over 70 (which for those of you who don't know is waaay too high for a 10-month-old) and retractions with more vomiting. I finally decided that, although I probably wouldn't react quite this strongly with any other child, given his history I was going to take this seriously. And so I brought him into the hospital in Maesot.
Almost right away the nurse warned me that he would probably be admitted. The doctor did little more than stick his stethoscope on Jabe's chest before jumping up and announcing that we were going to the ER. They gave him three nebulizer breathing treatments and the doctor said that, yes indeed, he thought that due to his history he should be admitted for close observation. But he didn't think that he had pneumonia. Problem was they were full and he would need to transfer us to the Maesot General Hospital.
We soon found ourselves in the ER repeating all the steps. Except that this is a big, very busy, dirty hospital and everything seems to take at least three times as long! Here the doctor decided that she thought he very likely did have pneumonia and promptly sent him off for blood work and a chest x-ray.
I can't believe this little guy! For me it's harder each and every time we have to go back in as each and every time he's older and more aware and more reactive to everything that happens. But despite him being sick, he has beamed left and right through each of the hospitals today. He grinned at them as they snapped on the tourniquet for the blood draw...beamed as he was strapped down to the table for his x-ray...sparkled his way through (part) of his nebulizer treatments...and in general put on a squealing, kissing, and giggling show in the ER.:) (Now I know that that doesn't make him sound like much of a hospital case, but just for comparison, last time he was sick [in the beginning] he was smiling and playing right up to when his fever was right around 105.)
The doctor did diagnose him with having pneumonia. Again. I would be extremely tickled if doctors could agree on their diagnosis's!
The highlight of my evening was having first class seating as a spectator in the ER to the treatment of a couple of good trauma cases. I could spend forever in there and not get tired of it, I think. (I don't mean all of that as unfeelingly as it sounds...us EMT's are just wired that way!) Remind me though to never come here for a trauma case - it's pretty sad. Finally sometime after 11 o'clock they brought us back to the ward.
The half of the ward we're in has eleven "beds". With people sleeping beneath almost every one, as well as the family members who sleep together with the patients on the beds. I'm not sure if I've ever quite described the hospital situation here, but normally it's pretty much a family affair. There's a half wall separating us from the other half of the children's ward, as well as patients overflowing into the hallway and even the a couple right outside the doors.
Currently Jabez and I are camped out on the floor on a mat right in-between the two rows of beds right in the middle of the walkway to the restroom There's a man snoozing on the floor beside me a couple feet to my left, and another one with his child directly behind my head. And there's three miscellaneous people standing around watching me type!
I'd have pictures right now if I was brave enough. Maybe later I'll get some if everyone ever falls asleep.:) The fluorescent lights stay on bright all night.
Everything in me tells me to run right now. While I still can. There's no IV's, no medicines, no nothing. It's 12:22 in the morning and Jabez is still lying here without any clothing on. (Thankfully they did just bring a blanket.)

Note: The doctor just came (at 1 o'clock in the morning!) I get the impression that they are a bit intimidated to give him antibiotics due to the SJS. She tells me that he has chronic lung disease... and that I really shouldn't be living with him in the environment that I am......... I still believe that God is greater than all of this. But I really need wisdom right now. Especially as what I really want to do right now is scoop him up and take off for somewhere where I feel as if I can trust the care.


  1. So sorry to about Jabez. :( We'll keep you, and him in prayer!

  2. I'm sad to hear that Jabez is sick again...It must be so tough. I'm praying for both of you.